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'The Electronic Health Records software works very well. I entered the patient's medications, vitals, and allergies. The software calculated the course of treatment, projected outcome, and anticipate insurance reimbursement.'
Man is dumber because of his smartwatch.
'Thank goodness I remembered to bring my sweatband.'
'My fitness band is telling me I need to be active more than one day a year.'
'My fitness tracker only logged three hours of sleep last night, but so far today I'm at five hours of day dreaming.'
'His vital signs are fine. That means his insurance just ran out.'
"Five thousand hours, and his vital signs are still strong."
'Check this out. These sharp drops in his vital signs coincide with visits from his inlaws.'
'I'm supposed to check your vitals, so I'm looking up your credit score.'
'I'm supposed to check you vitals, so I'll need to know if you can pay.'
'Yikes! And I thought my human doctor had cold hands!!!'