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"I'm afraid it's your body, Mr. Haskins."
"You've been eating again."
"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"
Tags:mushroom, mushrooms, fungus, fungi, grow, grows, growing, grow your own, growing your own, basement, basements, hobby, hobbies, hobbyist, hobbyists, obsession, obsessions, obsessive, body horror, transform, transforms, transforming, transformation, transformations, focus, focuses, hyperfocus, hyper focus, side effect, side effects, unhealthy, light, getting light, fresh air, poor health
"So what are you giving up for New Year?"
The Problem with Government Issued Curriculum
"Maybe we shouldn't line her cage with newspaper."
Tags:bird, birds, parrot, parrots, parakeet, parakeets, cockatiel, cockatiels, pet, pets, housepet, housepets, house pet, house pets, cage, cages, birdcage, birdcages, cage liner, cage liners, newspaper, newspapers, smoke, smokes, smoker, smokers, smoking, bad habit, bad habits, health, poor health, bad healthy, unhealthy, addict, addicts, addiction, addictions, stress, stresses, stressed out, anxiety, anxious, stressor, stressors, panic, panics, panicking, panic attack, panic attacks, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, news story, news stories, daily news, bad news
Elephant with human feet. Doctor says: 'It's humanitis.'
Edna's Doctor Fantasy
Tags:fantasy, doctor, doctors, doctor fantasy, doctor fantasies, health problem, health problems, healthy, healthy person, healthy people, health issue, health issues, poor health, chronic condition, chronic conditions, return visit, return visits, physician, physicians, doctor's office, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, unhealthy, ideal, ideals, ideal scenario, ideal scenarios
'You have the constitution of a comic-strip character with twice your newspaper circulation, Mr. Fusco.'
A Man has just died of a Heart attack about to enter a Cardiology centre
"9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer."
Tags:doctor, stethoscope, checkup, medical instrument, medical test, cold, freezer, freeze, hospital, medicine, medical, hospital bed, nurse, patient, hospital patient, pediatrician, doctor, diet, diet pill, prescribe, prescription drugs, pharmaceuticals, medicine, pill, ill, ailing, doctor hospital, poor health, medication, medicate, nurse, clinic, health care, family doctor
"I've seen bad cholesterol before, but yours is the baddest!"
Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'
"He said he's doing all he can to help me, but he can't make me any younger. But I have no interest in getting younger! I just don't want to keep getting older."
'Call for back-up.'
Visual Gag Cardiologist A Man has just died of a Heart attack about to enter a Cardiologist's office
'It's not the amount of wax I'm producing that bothers me, it's the wicks.'
'If she goes, we go!'
"The bad news is you've got one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel."
Tags:grave, graves, death, one foot in the grave, health, poor health, disease, ageing, ageing process, aging process, bananas, aging, nutrition, banana, good news, bad news, good news/bad news, examination, doctor, physician, exam, consult, consultation, diagnose, diagnosis, advice, medicine, medicines, ill, illness, fiber, dietary fiber, fibre, potassium, vitamin, mineral, supplement
A sick sandwich is in the hospital and is getting a transfusion on new Maya and Zesty Mustard.
Tags:sandwich, sandwiches, ivs, transfusions, mustard, mayo, iv, transfusion, intravenous, intensive care, maya clinic, hoagie, reuben sandwich, mayonnaise, doctor, stethoscope, checkup, medical instrument, medical test, cold, freezer, freeze, hospital, medicine, medical, hospital bed, nurse, patient, hospital patient, pediatrician, prescribe, prescription drugs, pharmaceuticals, medicine, pill, ill, ailing, doctor hospital, poor health, medication, medicate, nurse, clinic
"Such a sedentary lifestyle."
Tags:zoo, zoos, animals, lion, lions, captive, captivity, archaic, exercise, roam, obese, obesity, epidemic, obesity epidemic, cage, caged, fitness, fat, overweight, eat, overeat, lazy, laziness, hypocrite, hypocritical, inactive, lifestyle, poor health, unhealthy, wildlife, unnatural, habitat, environment, space, poor choices, wilderness, enclosed, diet, unethical, animal welfare, zoology, physical activity, quality of life, irony, imprisoned
Break Glass and Pull in the Event of Flaccid Pecs
Tags:emergency, emergencies, emergency procedure, emergency procedures, workout, workouts, bodybuilder, bodybuilders, bodybuilding, body-builder, body-builders, body-building, fitness, fit, health, exercise, weight, weights, weightlifting, weight training, train, training, obesity, poor health, sedentary, office job, office work, gym equipment