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"They're from David. He's been so much more considerate since I shot him."
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"He misspoke, I misheard, then shots rang out."
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"He believes domestic disputes should be between a man and a woman."
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'Well, since you ask, yes, your bum does look big in that.'
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"We got into an argument and now she's giving me the un-silent treatment."
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"I just downloaded fact-checker...fancy a little quarrel?"
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'Now we know what all that noise was about last night.'
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'Silvia, did I do something wrong?'
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Family arguments about leaving heating and lighting on are becoming more common!
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'And another thing - you hog the duvet!'
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Sign: Say It With Flowers. "She wouldn't listen."
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'How many times do I have to tell ya....UNPLUG THE TOASTER!'
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'How about letting me lay in the sunbeam for a while?'
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'Sorry, Annette can't come to the phone. She's in the garden.'
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"Officer, I know I was swerving all over the road, but I've bee fighting an incredible glare."
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