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Bedtime Of The Gods
Tags:ancient, ancient egypt, egypt, egyptian, egyptians, pagan, paganism, pagans, personification, personify, bedtime, teeth, tooth, toothbrush, dental, dental hygiene, dental care, oral, oral hygiene, toothpaste, floss, tooth paste, flossing, offering, offerings, sacrifice, sacrificing, god, gods, avatar, descended, descending, primitive, early man, primitive man, religious, religion, religious offering, religious imagery, invert, inverted, inversion
"And to those of you who did contribute to the church fund—our blessings."
Tags:religion, religious, church, churches, priest, priests, minister, ministers, pastor, pastors, clergyman, clergymen, reverend, reverends, sermon, sermons, parish, congregation, congregations, parishioner, parishioners, church-goer, church-goers, sick, sickness, ill, illness, disease, diseases, death, dying, church fund, church funds, donation, donations, offering, offerings, money, punishments, blessing, blessings, money-hungry, greedy, greed, sins, grotesque
Trial Balloons in Apartment 3-B
"Come on,Gelphin, every man has his price. How much for that hair of yours?"
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, hair, bald, balding, hair loss, alopecia, price, prices, toupee, toupees, wig, wigs, realistic, hairstyle, hairstyles, good hair, offer, offers, offering, money, bribery, bribe, bribes, inducement, inducing, inducements, every man has his price, proverb, proverbs, expression, expressions
"Whatever happened on that other island, this is the way he likes it now."
Tags:food, takeaway, takeaways, takeout, takeout, take-out, take-outs, delivery, container, containers, box, boxes, chinese, to go, new york, new york city, ny, nyc, ape, apes, giant ape, giant apes, gorilla, gorillas, giant, giants, monster, monsters, movie, movies, film, films, movie monster, movie monsters, sacrifice, sacrifices, sacrificing, offering, offerings, taste, tastes
"A word to the wise. When the gods speak, they'd better say 'across-the-board tax cut."
Tags:temple, temples, worship, worshiping, inca, incas, mayan, maya, god, gods, ancient civilizations, ancient culture, ritual, rituals, offering, offerings, oracle, oracles, ceremony, ceremonies, ancient ceremony, ancient ceremonies, ancient temple, ancient temples, religious ceremony, religious ceremonies, ancient ritual, ancient rituals, tax, taxes, tax cut, tax cuts, politics, taxation, tax policy, tax policies, fiscal policy, fiscal policies, treasury
"It being Saturday night, the gods have asked for pizza."
"My son is a millennial—I should just go to jail for him."
Tags:court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, legal system, justice system, law, laws, legal, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, client, clients, defense, defence, defendant, defendants, witness, witnesses, witness stand, kid, kids, child, children, son, sons, adult child, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, family, families, helicopter parent, helicopter parents, spoiled, coddled, indulgent, pampered, replace, replacing, exchange, exchanging, trading places, sacrifice, sacrifices, sacrificing, offer, offers, offering, millennial, millennials, modern parent, modern parents, modern parenting, modern life
Sacrifices at 4:00PM and 6:00PM
Tags:demon, demons, devil, devils, sacrifice, sacrifices, sacrificing, museum, museums, artifact, artifacts, effigy, effigies, statue, statues, altar, altars, idol, idols, religious imagery, religions, beast, the beast, wicked, satanist, satanism, doom, doomed, horror, scary, fear, fears, visiting hours, visitor hours, offering, offerings
"Repeat that offer in a business setting...party talk is cheap."
"Three yummies, a pat on the head, and a 'Good doggy.' That's my client's final offer."
Tags:animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, divorce, divorces, split, splits, separation, separations, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, family law, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, negotiation, negotiations, negotiating, offer, offers, offering, final offer, treat, treats, biscuit, biscuits, pat, pats, good dog, praise, client, clients, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, mediation
'Billy, you're embarrassing us. Please stop saying 'ka-ching, ka-ching'.'
"I was comped."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, pepper, black pepper, pepper mill, pepper mills, pepper grinder, pepper grinders, fresh, fresh pepper, freshly ground pepper, leaf, leaves, raked, raking, season, seasons, seasonal, fall, autumn, offering
"And as part of your severance package you can choose either a jar of my homemade salsa or some of my Texas-style barbecue sauce."
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, firing, laid off, fired, unemployed, unemployment, termination, downsizing, severance, severance package, severance packages, redundancy, choice, choices, salsa, barbecue sauce, barbeque sauce, homemade, food, consolation, personnel, hr, h.r., human resources, offer, offers, offering
Basketball Hoop on the Suggestion Box
"You've been with us a long time, Winnie, and we're prepared to offer you a generous severance package."
Tags:animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, firing, hr, h.r., human resources, offer, offering, generous, severance, package, packages, redundant, redundancy, laid-off, unemployment, money, business, businessman, businessmen, office, office, office life, modern life
'Not only can we build it for the same price as any other gingerbread house, but we can do it for 40% less carbs and no trans fats!'
"Now and then I offer it a small sacrifice such as yourself."
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, god, gods, sacrifice, sacrifices, offering, offerings, human sacrifices, religion, religious, threat, threats, threatening, creepy, scary, time to quit, statue, statues
Do you need a hand?
'Talk about a stressful day... three people offered me jobs.'
'I volunteered since the job market is so bad right now.'
Tags:idol, idols, stone idol, stone idols, statue, statues, aztec, aztecs, astec idol, aztec idols, sacrifice, sacrifices, gossip, gossiping, gossips, gossipers, chat, chatting, complain, complaining, entitled, entitlement, offering, offerings, religious offering, religious offering, mesoamercian culture, post-classic period, aztec culture, gods, idle gossip, idle gossiping, papaya, papayas, food offering, food offerings, goat, goats, mesoamerican, mesoamerican religion, catch-up, catches up, catching up
"Let's quit helping those who don't need help, stop supporting failed programs, cut entitlements...and offer the dog to the gods."
Tags:conservative, conservatives, social conservative, social conservatives, budget hawk, budget hawks, budget cut, budget cuts, entitlement, entitlements, entitlement program, entitlement programs, dog, dogs, sacrifice, sacrifices, republican, republicans, libertarian, libertarians, caveman, cavemen, cave man, cave men, spending, deficit, deficits, deficit spending, austerity, austerity measure, austerity measures, outdated, outdated idea, outdated ideas, liberal, liberals, socialist, socialists, socialism, left-wing, offering, offerings, primitive, primitives, paleocon, paleocons, paleoconservative, paleoconservatives
"All we can do is continue offering sacrifices and hope its magic power will return."
Tags:cave, caveman, prehistory, prehistoric, pre historic, pre-historic, pre-history, cavemen, neanderthal, neanderthals, homo sapien, homo sapiens, homo erectus, early man, early men, stone age, stone-age, stone ages, stone-ages, dark age, dark-age, iron age, iron ages, bronze age, bronze ages, sacrifice, sacrifices, sacrificial, time travel, tech, technological, clash, culture clash, offering, offerings, altar, altars, magic, magical